Fix it men & part time gangsters

I’ve known a lot of people growing up. Most of them, hustlers of some kind. Drugs. Guns. Hoes. Very few pimps. But most sold drugs. I didn’t know many thieves though. Yea boosters were a dime a dozen, but never many thieves or robbers. Stick up Kids.. are usually lone wolves. That’s how they conduct their business. But the drug game was enormous. It was everywhere. Unavoidable. Everyone was involved in it, whether you knew it or not. Those Iceberg sweaters you got half off or that big thing of laundry detergent, 4 deodorants, and 2 body washes you got for twenty dollars... yea, you got that from the game. The drug game is the cause and effect to your cheap necessities. It's a selfish business, but we're all involved. We sell/provide a product that can potentially destroy a life… a family.. a community.  All for a dollar. Whether it was coke, dope, or weed. It didn’t matter. And I guess the argument is.. just as much as the drug dealer is responsible, so is the user. This is true.

We saw it as “they know what this shit is doing to them, but they still buy it and what the fuck we gonna do, not sell it?" It’s all business.. but, its all for personal gain. Whether it’s money or a high. It's all the same.

Is there a right and...or wrong? It couldn't be. Because we operate in chaos. Not just us, the world operates in chaos. The news reports on more good than bad, hospitals treat the sick not the healthy, bad news travels fast. This is us. This is America.

Although this is an after thought, I’m guilty for my participation. At the time I didn’t see it that way… selfish. I saw it as I was doing it to take the "load off" my mother. To provide for myself and those around me. Although bad, a lot of good came from it. Beyond the old saying “money, cars, clothes and hoes”… we were able to take care of families. Pay bills. Provide another day of privilege or experiences. We threw bus rides for kids, fed the older people on the block. Filled out money orders, We paid ConEd and TimeWarner bills for grandmothers and girlfriends, bailed out friends, gave money to single mothers for groceries. We did it all. We were fix it men and part time gangsters.

“We did bad with good intentions.” 

“Trying to find the right way to do the wrong things.”

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions"

written by a Troubled Youth