Rules Of Engagement: Save Your Sorry(s)

There's a duality to this rule. This rule's explicit intention is to outline the power that is forfeited when offering or accepting an apology.

Acceptance: Avoid accepting or asking for apologies. For, an apology is nothing more than a transfer of energy and guilt. An apology allows the person who has disrespected you the opportunity to relieve themselves of their own guilt by saying "I'm sorry" and shifting that energy onto you. Do not let them apologize. Let them sit with their guilt. Don't accept or ask for anything. Let their guilt be the succession of their wrong doing.

Accepting an apology makes you weak. Forgiveness makes you weak. It tells that person what you are willing to allow. An apology is the gateway to disrespect. Once an apology is given and accepted, the clock starts over.

Allowing someone the opportunity.. I reluctantly use the word opportunity, because "opportunity" is not generous enough to illustrate the true power that is forfeited when you allow someone to apologize.. Allowing someone the freedom (much better word).. allowing someone the freedom to apologize, leaves you powerless. Have you ever noticed the shift in someone's energy once they've apologized?.. Yes, that's what I'm referring to.

When you don't allow that person to apologize, you force them to internalize their decision(s) and wrong doing(s). It becomes a mental prison.. and the apology is like probation, that will allow them to make the same mistake. Force them to sit with their thoughts of guilt. Do not allow them to emancipate their feelings. In the end, they then begin to fully understand their mistake.

Offering: By societal norms, when you're wrong, you should apologize.. we've been conditioned of this thought/action since we were children. That thought/action no longer holds the same meaning and should be stripped from your subconscious reaction.

Save your sorry(s).

Saying sorry, makes you appear weak.. Weak in the sense that you can't stand behind your word or decision making. It makes you look inadequate.. even after you apologize, the thought of inadequacy persists in their mind. It remains there, until the time presents itself and you apologize again. In return, people begin to lose respect for you..

Its better to be respected, than to be sorry.

Apologizing dilutes your character. It chips away at the reputation you once had. Refusing to apologize or to offer an apology will steer others into an uncomfortable state.. because, again, by societal norms, we've been conditioned that, when someone is wrong, that person is supposed to apologize.. When you don't fall into the mold of societal norms, it begins to make people uncomfortable. You will soon find them getting out of character begging you to follow their rules of normalcy, pushing their emotions on you, just for a reaction.. Just to pull the slightest glimpse of an apology from you. Say nothing. Save your sorry. In return, they forfeit their power and begin to understand that you won't compromise, bend, or fold. They understand that you are to be respected no matter your position.

Rules Of Engagement R.O.E are a set of internal rules that define the degree and/or manner in which the use of strategic thought and action(s) are applied. Rules Of Engagement must be consistent, while accounting for a variety of potential uncertainties. Each rule is singular and can stand on its own to achieve the result in which you desire.. or rules can be assembled and utilized simultaneously. Rules of Engagement does not dictate how a result is to be achieved, but will guide what measures are unacceptable.